Let me say first, I'm as hetro as it gets. However, I'm secure enough in my manhood to admit I have one HUGE man crush on Jack Bauer. You know Jack, right? 24's lead agent who, in at least 6 televised days, has yet to go to the bathroom or brush his teeth (ewwwww). But I'm tellin' you, I'm hooked.
Back to that reply email thing from a few posts past, I received an email recently with some "Jack Bauer truths". These are just a few of my favorites:
Jack Bauer let the dogs out.
1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.
Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.
When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.
And, not to be outdone, here are some of the BEST actual quotes from CTU's most famous agent:
"If you don't tell me what I want to know, then it'll just be a question of how much you want it to hurt."
"The only reason that you're conscious right now is because I don't want to carry you."
"I'm gonna need a hacksaw." (You don't want to know the context...)
"What's going on? You mean besides a 747 falling out of the sky and a threat on a presidential candidate's life?"
"I'm the last thing you will ever see if anything happens to my wife or my daughter."
And, quite possibly my favorite: "You have no idea how far I am willing to go to acquire your cooperation."
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Yeah, baby! Jack's the man!!
Post a Comment